Thailand Nightlife Roundup

Welcome to my website.  Unlike the universe, this website has a purpose: to offer rants, tirades, opinions and discussion about books on Thailand, give an overview of nightlife in Thailand and, yes, to provide a few news items which might not appear elsewhere.  And to have some fun.

Bar, club and restaurant owners who would like to send material on their special events, birthday bashes, anniversary parties, etc., are welcome to do so but please remember men in Thailand are a bit jaded so if you’re just going to offer the usual free gourmet food and free full band entertainment and free beautiful and eager-to-please women, well, the lads have been there, done that. So do try to offer potential patrons something special. ;-)

There is a contest every two weeks when this column appears and the first to answer the question correctly or identify a photograph correctly will receive vouchers worth at least 3,000 baht in food and drink, i.e., 500 baht each, from Larry's Dive, The Londoner, The Old Dutch, Electric Blue, The Big Mango and Bourbon Street Cafe. The prizes will build up in case anyone doesn't win it immediately so the bonanza for the eventual winner could get quite interesting.  Second prize is one of my books or else a 500-baht book gift voucher from Dasa Books.

I will also add information to a column as I receive it or report on nightlife as I encounter it so check back now and again as there may be much new even within a week or ten days.  And please remember a part of all money received from the sale of my books goes to needy Thais (in the form of payment to go go dancers, waitresses and hostesses).


What I think of Thailand's Taksin isn't fit to print but I always enjoy hearing other points of view from intelligent people.  In this case, it was an intelligent Muslim taxi driver whose English was quite good.  He said he likes him because he has done a lot against corruption.  (Don't tell that to farang bar-owners in Thailand.)  But he made a good case.  He said before Taksin, anyone could get drugs (yaba) at any gas station.  Now that has all stopped and the price of yaba has gone way up because it is more difficult to get.  He also said something about how Taksin closed the illegal gambling casino in the Pratunam area and how he got rid of the main mafia bosses in places like Cholburi.  Oh, yes, he also likes him because he can speak English and he named prime ministers in recent times who couldn't and who needed translators when abroad and the driver thought not speaking English was unseemly for a prime minister.  Well, he certainly didn't change my mind, but it was an interesting chat.

The Thai wife of a friend of mine said that Taksin stepping aside but basically appointing his replacement was like a man who agrees to give up driving and then is chauffeured about by a man who takes his orders.  Well said.

This just in from "Undercover 319": Only in Thailand...I walked past Lolita's today and on the Lolita's sign was a smaller sign that said Staff wanted.

I had a small growth on my arm and the dermatologist at Samitivej Hospital used liquid hydrogen spray of some sort.  It was incredibly cold.  But it worked.  No, wait a minute, liquid hydrogen is liquid rocket fuel.  I guess it was liquid nitrogen.  I hope.  I mean, I'm sure she knew what she was doing.  I think.  Brrr.

Look Out!

A young Cambodian man raped and killed a 13-year-old girl.  Unfortunately, nothing new about that.  But in this case her eyes appeared to have been gouged out after the attack.  "Cambodians believe the eyes of a murdered person retain the image of the last person they see, and murderers sometimes remove them, fearing they will lead the police to the perpetrator."  Um, I think this guy should have watched a few more of those popular crime shows involving the work of crime scene units.

Gulliver's is, of course, a very popular and very large pub/bar/restaurant/pool hall/pick-up-place on Sukhumvit soi 5 with a Chevy attached to the ceiling twirling around; a model made before any of the females in the room were born.  The food isn't bad either.  And don't forget there are four free computers at Gullivers for girls to send I-Luv-You-Too-Much messages to their many admirers abroad while picking up other guys.  Thailand: I Luv You Too Much!

I was sitting in Big Dogs when a friend came jogging up all excited to tell me to hurry up and come up to Spanky's bar because it was full of beautiful women and there were no guys in there.  Spanky's is a small bar I usually avoid as last time I was in there the women were not particularly fantastic.  But that was a long time ago and anyway the Spanky's sign is actually working again so I figured I better check it out.  Well, yes, the girls were much prettier than before but about equal to those all over Nana Plaza.  I think the explanation can be found in that my friend just returned from boring Malaysia and is still a bit hyper at seeing lovely Thai women again.  Not sure why the Spanky's sign's animation was off so long but it's animated again.

There is a theory that punters who send money back to Entertainment Providers in Thailand can be divided into three categories: The one who falls madly in love, the one who feels a need to "save" the girl from her horrible, pain-filled existence shining brass poles on a dance floor, and the one who simply collects women and feels a sense of power by adding to his collection.  Interesting theory.  And probably true, because I have known all three kinds of men.  Do you fall into one of these categories?  As for myself, after a long period of soul-searching (several seconds) I realized I don't.  I have no interest in collecting women to feel powerful; I don't think most of them earning go go dancer salaries in farang areas need saving; and I'm not madly in love with any of them.  Which reveals a fourth category:  Those of us who are madly in love with all of them.  It is those of us in this category who are the truly lost!

"There's too much bad poetry being written today.  People just don't know how to write down a simple easy line.  It's difficult for them: it's like trying to keep a hard-on while drowning - not many can do it..."  Charles Bukowski 

A typical Thailand scene:  Boyfriend leaves Thailand for quite some time; girlfriend is not happy about it; boyfriend returns with a big smile and with duty free gifts; girlfriend begins to cheer up.  All's well that ends well.



All of us have been affected by Thailand, some more than others.  We wash up on these shores perhaps intending to return to our homeland in a few weeks or months.  Then the years pass; then the decades pass.  But you must not assume only the down-and-out or depraved losers or bizarre weirdos are affected by the spirit of the Land of Smiles.  Recently an Aussie in the Queensland state parliament resigned his seat due to criticism from from his Labor Party colleagues.  It seems the gentleman in question was requesting three months off to have a knee operation in Thailand, had spent six out of the last 24 months in Thailand, and just happened to have a Thai wife with three children in Surin.  Oh, well, as they say, when one door closes, another opens.  And as I mentioned some time ago, I know of a case where a guy came to Thailand from England for a knee operation, fell in love with a nurse named Nee, and therefore "got kneed in Thailand" in more ways than one. 

Did you know that a woman who doesn't dance anymore but who still works in a bar in Angeles City, P.I., is called a GRO (Guest Relations Officer)?  And all this time you thought she was a mamasan, didn't you?  And did you know that should you decide to barfine a dancer she is said to be having an EWR (Early Work Release)?  I don't know what you're going to do with that information but there it is.

Chris Coles is doing some interesting work on the nightlife areas of Thailand through his painting.  Click on this one at left and then check out his work at chriscolesgallery.




Holy Stress

A 73-year-old Buddhist priest and nursery-school principal in Japan was arrested for having had sex with a 15-year-old girl.  He also seems to have had sex with four or five young girls for money on more than 20 occasions.  According to the priest he "couldn't resist the lust and that he relieved work-related stress by engaging in sex acts with young girls."


And of course it could only happen in America where a guy sued the city of Lodi, California, because a dump truck backed into his vehicle.  Even though he was the one driving the truck at the time.


Here is a photograph of an advertisement for "Miss Puke Thai Tradition Massage."  A reader was kind enough to send it in.  I am certain that this establishment (on Sukhumvit, soi 33) is in for a lot of business.  If, on the other hand, it fails, I hope they don't blame the Nang Kuat or other figures on the shrine designed to bring in customers.





I've had so many letters asking for explanations about the situation regarding the bees and the shrine at Nana Plaza.  Well, actually, I haven't had any asking about that subject but it sounds cool to say that I have.  The thing is, as I may have mentioned, I love to walk through nightlife areas during the daytime; it's a bit like seeing a beautiful woman with her makeup off.  And, sure enough, Nana Plaza looks quite a bit different by day than by night.  In the morning only Big Dogs was open and one open-air bar outside Playskool a go go.  Everyone is relaxed, it is quiet, the coasters and washcloths and whatnot are drying in the bright sunlight, the cats are asleep, the girls are half asleep, the shrines have yet to be fixed up for the evening.  And that's what attracted my attention. 


You see, if you stand in front of the shrine at Nana Plaza in the daytime you will see what food there is is surrounded by bees.  Lots of them.  But almost all the bees are greedily eating away inside the dish of Thai sweets.  But not just any sweet!  Of all the colors and flavors, the bees at Nana were avariciously, greedily, hungrily clinging only to the orange-colored candy, frenetically humping it, it seemed.  It was almost a sexual thing.  Kind of fanatic; like the love scene on Brokeback Mountain. 


Stunned by this revelation, this epiphany, I dragged a perplexed girl from behind the open-air bar and pointed out this bizarre phenomenon to her.  She said something like, "Yeah, the orange ones are sweeter, like a flower, so the bees like those most."  And then she walked off.  She seemed less than impressed at my discovery but, now you know, and remember you read it here first:  Nana Plaza bees favor orange-colored Thai sweets the most because the orange-colored sweets are sweeter.

From the Mail Bag

As I am sure 100 people have told you, (I only just read your new column), Phak Ga (a pen) is mouth of a crow, i.e., the crow's beak.  Think pen nib or even quill.  Charley Grissom

(This was in response to my discussion of why the Thais refer to a pen by saying "pakka" as opposed to, for example, "Schaeffer".)  Thanks, Charlie, I know the words for crow and mouth in Thai, but I didn't realize Parker (phak ga) was actually a crow's beak.  I do suspect that the Thais simply gave it a romanization with a translation that made sense.  But that still leaves the question as to why Parker won over Schaeffer.  Was the Schaeffer salesman asleep at the switch or otherwise engaged in a local brothel?


Reading your column, after rushing off my photo entry, I can sympathize with the punter who was stood up after paying his bar-fine.
I was in G-Spot on Thursday, taking advantage of spouse returning home to Issan for the hols, and paid the fine for a delightful young filly who claimed she was 17, the mamasan claimed was 19 and who told me she worked in Phuket until the tsunami so was probably 20 or so. I hope!
I was happily getting away with a two-finger massage, which she was certainly enjoying, when she spotted a newcomer who she said she had to talk with. A minute later she was back telling me he was a regular and she wanted to go with him. As I'd told her I wasn't climbing the stairs with her that particular night I couldn't really create too much of a fuss, despite having investing 3 hours and 1600 baht in her.
Hi ho. Still keeping my word to go back and see her on Saturday night though for the full monty.

Bangkok Barry


There is always someone to look up to.  A long term drinking buddy just turned 89.  The conversation in the Madrid (Patong I) went something like this.  I  had asked where was Khun Bill.  "Khun Les, Khun Bill him go home for birthday.  Tomorrow him be 89.  Him be 89, him still like young girls, same you!  I think that why you and Khun Bill be good friend."

Les the Ageless


Hi Dean:  At Rawhide, there were a number of Songkran events, including a costume
competition and a draw for free drinks where the winning tickets were picked
by volunteers from the underwear of the dancers. A farang customer was plied
with enough drink for him to act as MC for this event.
Rawhide (and I believe Long Gun) still have shows where young ladies fire
darts at balloons and smoke cigarettes. It was Spalding Gray who referred to
the girls' nether regions saying that they "use them to do everything under
the sun except make babies."
It was interesting to see one customer grumbling to the owner that such
shows are not what people want to see, and he pointed out, somewhat
accurately, that a lot of people did seem to get up and leave around that
The interesting thing is that customers always assume, as perhaps they
should, that everything is arranged for their benefit. I suspect that some of
the time that is not the case. I suspect that sometimes the girls who do
these sort of shows are the girls who are a little older, who don't get so
many customers, and whom the owner doesn't want to include in the 'sexy
show'. So to try and find a use for them, the girls learn special skills. I think
often the reason these shows are included is because the owner feels a
responsibility to keep the girl involved and in employment. Loyalty to your
employees, even if it means inventing work for them to do is quite common in
So rather than getting up and leaving, and thinking of the shows as a
disgusting and degrading freakshow, perhaps one should admire the skill of
the performer, her admirable dedication to her art, and think of them as a
unique cultural performance, which has the added benefit of providing work
for ladies who otherwise might have to be retired.  Bob Parks


Hi Dean, just passed by your website (while arguing with the missus, drinking
cheap whisky and putting the kids to bed). While I am not living in LOS I
still had the opportunity to get into all manners of violent troubles with
Thai guys - but during my 25 trips with a combined duration of 3 years I
never had a single problem. Like you describe, I have passed aggressive Thai
guys just waiting to fight, and then greeted them with a cool "bai Naii?" or
"mau rue yang?" and never suffered anything but greetings and positive
interest. I must admit that I have seen many of my pig skinned countrymen
(Danish) run into trouble when acting like they are at home, but I guess they
just don't get it - and deserve the beating. Looking forward to new readings and my next trip scheduled for July.
Best regards, Jonas 


Hi Dean

Just had a read of your website.  You write well.  Have you ever

considered writing books for a living?  Cheers,  Phil


Ha, Ha, very funny.  I find there is no money in books so I have decided to rent my body out to beautiful Thai women.  No takers yet.



In all the fun of Songkran, my friend's mobile phone got totally soaked, and even the experts of MBK couldn't fix it.  So he bought a cheap second-hand replacement, put his SIM in, and was thankfully now back in contact with the world.  As he was looking through the phone and setting the time, putting in phone numbers etc., he was surprised to discover that there were still some old text-messages stored in the phone, and even more surprised to see that they were in English.  Of course, he couldn't resist taking a look.  There were about ten messages, and they told a classic story:

     "Hello my darling. I miss you so much. When you come back Thailand?"
     "I miss you all the days. I cannot sleep for think you."
     "I stop work bar now. Not go other man. Only wait you my darling."
     He says he knew what was coming next:  "I have small promprem no money. Cannot pay room. You can help me darling?"
And the next message was just a bank account number and details.  My friend chuckled to himself and thought that there really is one born every minute. What a sucker!
But this wasn't the last message. The next one was from a different sender, and it was about a production meeting for a film. My friend is in the film business.  Now he was confused.  Only as he read more messages did he realize...These were messages that had somehow been stored deep inside his SIM card, and had somehow managed to restore themselves to the phone.  The sucker he was laughing at was himself three years before!


Songkran at Nana Plaza and Soi Cowboy was largely a fun and friendly experience for one and all.  Who would not enjoy playing with cute drunken girls with wet clothes clinging to their nubile forms?  But when you get people drinking large amounts of alcohol all afternoon, riding motorbikes, and attacking each other (and each other's girlfriends) with supercharged water-pistols, it is inevitable that there will occasionally be problems. 

A friend of mine witnessed an event at the entrance to Nana where a large and somewhat drunken farang got into an altercation with a Thai, and in seconds it turned nasty, he was on the ground, and being kicked.  It was a Thai guy who warded off his attackers, raised him to his feet, somewhat bloodied, and helped him on his way.  (Obviously, he didn't read my advice in my last column about Mama's warnings regarding getting into fights in Thailand).

Another friend told me about an argument on Soi Cowboy.  One of the waiters from the Penny Black Hotel, a cousin of a star dancer at the Long gun, was hit over the head with a bottle by an employee of another well-known Soi Cowboy go-go bar.  The waiter had to go to the hospital and be stitched up.

The next day, revenge was of course in order, and so a similar bottle blow was delivered in return, also requiring hospital stitches.  Sure enough, before you could say Jets and Sharks and West Side Story five times fast, an entire posse from the go go bar gathered outside Penny Black, looking for a fight, and threatening to return with knives and guns.  Disaster was near.  A fight between the bars would draw the wrong kind of attention, put off customers, and might result in shutdowns, arrests, hurt business and piss off whatever gods may be in charge of Bangkok's nightlife areas.

Which makes it even more surprising that the owner of the go go bar was also brandishing a bottle along with the mob from her bar, demanding retribution.  The owner of the Penny Black acted with far more common sense.  She called the police and demanded an end to hostilities.  It was a minor event, one perhaps not even noticeable to anyone passing by on the other side of Soi Cowboy, but it might have got quickly out of hand.  It does seem that the owner of the go go bar was acting as irresponsibly as her staff.


Did you notice the fire trucks closing off soi 23 to traffic the other night?  Not sure what the problem was but it shut down most of the bars on the Baccara side of Soi Cowboy for several hours.


Thailand-based novelist David Young will appear at Dasa Book Cafe for the second session in their “Meet the Author” series on Saturday, May 6, from 1 to 3 pm.


Young is the author of the new detective novel Bangkok Dick, as well as four other books that feature a Thailand setting.  I've read and enjoyed three of David's novels and hope to find time to read the rest.  By the time he reaches my venerable age, I fear David might write circles around me so of course I have paid Mok the Motorcycle Man to have David eliminated.  Nothing personal.


Dasa Book Café is located at 710/4 Sukhumvit Road, between Soi 26 and 28. The shop is across the street from the Tops Miracle Mall.

Phone: 02-661-2993  E-mail:


I just received news of the passing of Denis Segaller.  Denis was 91, loved Thailand and wrote for the Bangkok Post, Bangkok World and many other publications.  He also did several books such as Thai Ways and one for me titled, Traditional Thailand.  When I was publisher of Sawasdee magazine for Thai International, he wrote many articles on Thai culture.  He was a devout Buddhist and meditated several hours a day.  He was also a very fine fellow.  He will be missed.


It seems that Google is mucking about with by asking them to take down their Google ads.  I sent one letter to Google asking them to lay off.  And this is the same we-love-freedom Google that is allowing the Chinese government to censor them in China.  For the article, click here.


So there is a new two baht coin, just slightly larger than the one baht coin.  Maybe minting such a coin makes sense, I just can't see what it is.


I heard a disturbing story about a well-known bar-owner whose business partner 'disappeared' leaving him the entire stake. If what I heard was true, it was a very nasty business. But of course it could be entirely malicious gossip.
I had an excellent burger at The Big Mango. This bar is said to be located in rather a bad position. I seem to remember that no business has ever done very well in that site. But the owners seem to be working hard, and it looks like the bar is becoming a worthy replacement to Woodstock.

Every Bangkok street has become a sea of heads, lined as they are with thousands of posters for the senatorial candidates.  It is indeed hopelessly messy and surely not very productive, but if one eradicated everything that was messy and unproductive in Thailand, the place would lose its charm.  Fo shore!


Go go dancers are great, aren't they?  Click here for my favorite.

Also please click here in case you never saw a publicity photograph for my book, The Go Go Dancer who Stole My Viagra & other Poetic Tragedies of Thailand.  And the reason you never saw it is because the local newspapers refused to run it.  They run photos of all the latest automobiles and the latest computer devices accompanied, of course, by sexily clad maidens.  Yet, when it comes to books, they don't.  What's up with that?

My kind of writer: "Yet he (Gustave Flaubert) was a seasoned harlot-hound and brothel-bibber; on his famous trip of 1849-51, with Maxime Du Camp, to Egypt, Syria and Turkey, he took in as much flesh as antiquity. His letters are scandalously scatological."  New York Times

According to some Muslims in Indonesia, even though the new Playboy magazine introduced there has been toned down, and no nudity, it is more of a threat to Indonesia than terrorism.  "This is a kind of moral terrorism that destroys the way of the life of the nation in a systematic and long-term way."  Isn't it interesting that fanatics always overlook what really harms people?  I mean, for example, health Nazis in Thailand want cigarettes in stores out of sight but never worry about corruption, a horrible education system and intimidation of the press or, for that matter, the fumes of busses and automobiles which is far more harmful than cigarettes.  Fanatics like the Indonesian above are so fascinated by sex that they see sex as the greatest danger.  But they never learn any truths about themselves.  The Playboy issue sold out proving that Indonesian men want it, but the office is shut down at the time of this writing, because fanatics attacked it, injuring policemen and smashing windows.

Thanks to reader Jim Watling for pointing out a website with an interesting article exploring Thai character and values and beliefs:  I notice it also has an interesting essay on gestures of the Buddha.


Way back in 1979 I took a boat up the Kok River between Chiang Mai and Chiang Rai to see how safe it was because my parents were coming out for a visit and not long before there had been a hill tribe or bandit shootout and a Swiss tourist in a boat had been shot dead.  So I took my trip, decided, what the hell, it seemed safe enough.  So they came and we made the trip again and part way up the river at a police stop there was an interesting sign:

     Requesss For the Foreign Touries

- Please keep yours passport ready inspection

- To beware of pick pocket

- Don't moved far alone, will have danger from the murder may be

- Please take care of yours baggages will be pulling or snatching from the thieves

- What trouble will you have? Please call the police behind you


Thanks for yours kindly

From Mae Aie police-station


Happy to say that we had no trouble, although the sign may have made my parents a bit nervous.


What Happens When Lovers of Thai Women Leave Thailand?

    I've been spending some time in Zero Beach, sorry, I mean, Vero Beach, Florida, taking care of ageing parents.  There are only about 30 Thais living in the area but there are a few Thai restaurants, the best being Bangkok in Downtown.  The food is not bad and the Thais seem to hang out there.  But I got so desperate to hear the voice of a Thai woman - and this is just between us - that I called the 800 number of Thai International and listened to the recording; made by a young Thai woman who doesn't quite get the "s" on the endings right, and she makes all the other not-quite-perfect sounds in English which are, for some of us, at least, genuine, turn-ons.  Listening to her talk about inflight information was like listening to a sex line.  If you think that is desperate, read on:

I remember the night I first saw her.  It was nearing the end of the second month I stayed at my parents' mobile home in Vero Beach.  The twilight had bathed the sky in one of those gorgeous saffron Florida sunsets but by eight o'clock the sunset had faded and lights had twinkled on.  I might never even have seen her if it hadn't been for Honey, my mother's Yorky.  The dog had ventured onto the neighbor's lawn and I approached to ensure she had not left what my stepfather referred to as a "calling card."                         

     At the side of the house, stretching for several yards beneath the pendulous branches of a bottlebrush tree, were low mounds of impatiens.  Among their bright green leaves were vivid splashes of pink, red, white, salmon, lavender blue and violet.  In the center were rose impatiens.  Their leaves had white margins and their double blooms resembled tiny rose buds.  And in the center of all this brilliant color, almost caressed by the double flowers of the rose impatiens, was the one lawn ornament that I was to become interested in, fascinated by, and finally, obsessed with.

For several weeks, the ornament had been hidden from view by the bright scarlet stamens of the bottlebrush tree which drooped their thick clusters toward the ground.  When I looked up from the recently mowed grass, the warm northeast breeze blew through the branches of the tree causing the soft bristle-like stamens to dance to and fro and that is when I had my first tantalizing glimpse of her. 

She was meticulously, almost uncannily, detailed and hand painted by someone who had showered her creation with loving care.  A rain forest garden fairy made of polystone.  She sat atop a rectangular polystone replica of a forest ledge.  Her shoulders and upper chest were bare and her emerald green dress was painted to resemble a skimpy Tinkerbell pixie outfit the whimsical, wildly uneven, hemline of which reached to her upper thighs.  Her legs were crossed, black ankle boots encased her feet and behind her her great black-and-green butterfly wings seemed poised to whisk her away even as I stared.  She held a wand in her right hand, black with red trim, a wand no doubt able to perform whatever magic she wished to conjure up.  She wore a simple silver tiara and her long black hair billowed outward as if caught in the warm wind.  A few strands had been painted as if blown against her forehead and her left hand was raised as if she was reaching up to sweep her hair back into place.  She might have just stepped onto the stage and into one of the shows at Long Gun or Angelwitch.

     I am not certain how long I stood staring at her but I was abruptly pulled from my trance by Honey's barking, as she disliked wind and was anxious to get back inside.  It was then that I noticed the statue a few yards behind her and off to the side.  Almost obscured by a thick clump of pink hibiscus was a very relaxed leprechaun perched on a toadstool with a pipe in his mouth.  His striking red beard contrasted with his black top hat, and although his elf-like grin and posture suggested he was at peace with the world, his dark eyes never left the garden fairy.  I think I knew even then that he would be a competitor for her affection.


Yep, after several weeks out of Thailand living in an American town, even goddamn lawn ornaments like Snow White and Little Red Riding Hood and especially the forest fairy started looking reaaal good.  How I consummated my passion with the forest fairy will be revealed in the next column.  But, remember, this is just between us because I don't want anyone out there thinking I am a bit beyond the norm.

Warning: This column contains the artificial sweeteners known as satirin and sexin.  Tests show that satirin and sexin may cause upset stomachs, headaches, red faces and uncontrollable erections.  Column Ingredients: 65 per cent Satirin, 20 per cent sexin, 10 per cent ridicuin, 5 per cent lamponin.  Contents under pressure.

Links You Might Enjoy

A video of a five-minute walk down Soi Cowboy.  Click here and then click "preview videos."


Like satire on Thailand?  Try

Like to know what music is playing where in Bangkok each week?  Try

Like to know more in depth about what music is playing where in Bangkok each week?  Try this great site:


Tired of shoveling snow?  Check out Bangkok's sunshine.


Bangkok's weather report.




A great site for listening to Thai Morlan music and other folk music of Southeast Asia.




A bit of black leather never hurts.  But she does.


Our Lady in Black




Like to learn a bit about retiring in Asia?




Maps of all the provinces of Thailand


Links You Might Not Enjoy

T-Shirt Hell: for lovers of very black humor only.


Politically incorrect rants and raves from Uncle Fred.



Do you have a product or service you would like to advertise on this website? You can, you know. In fact, you don’t have to have a product or service at all; you can just send me money. Or perhaps you would like me to plug a product or service that you are involved in? Sure, just send me cash. Be sure, however, to mark the outside envelope:

“Birthday money for Dean Barrett –

Absolutely No Bribe Enclosed

Got feedback to this column?  Got information on Thailand you would like to share?  Happy as a dung beetle to be living in Paradise?  Been ripped off?  Just write me at




Last week's contest was an easy one, lots of folks got it.  The elephant was marching along in from of Gulliver's Pub, Sukhumvit soi 5.  This week, as a change of pace, let's try a literary-related question.  Mark David Chapman shot John Lennon.  John Hinckley shot President Reagan.  Both were named John, right, but that's not the question.  Both claimed they were deeply affected by a book.  In fact, Hinckley had detailed his shooting plan in the book which was by his bedside.  Chapman actually had begun signing his name as the main character in this book, read the book after shooting Lennon while waiting for the police, and said the shooting was done to promote the book.  Name the book, author, and character in the book.

That's all for this fortnightly column.  Drop by again.  Explore the rest of the website.  Meanwhile, as the girls used to tell me during the 1960's: "I no lie you, GI, you number one!"  And, remember: Nothing says goodbye like a bullet.

Dean Barrett can be flamed at:

 Back to the Welcome Page