THAILAND NIGHTLIFE REVIEW

 

 

Welcome to my website.  Unlike the universe, this website has a purpose: to offer rants, tirades, opinions and discussion about books on Thailand, give an overview of nightlife in Thailand and, yes, to provide a few news items which might not appear elsewhere.  And to have some fun.

Bar, club and restaurant owners who would like to send material on their special events, birthday bashes, anniversary parties, etc., are welcome to do so but please remember men in Thailand are a bit jaded so if you’re just going to offer the usual free gourmet food and free full band entertainment and free beautiful and eager-to-please women, well, the lads have been there, done that. So do try to offer potential patrons something special. ;-)

There is a contest every two weeks when this column appears and the first to answer the question correctly or identify a photograph correctly will receive vouchers worth at least 3,500 baht in food and drink, i.e., 500 baht each, from Larry's Dive, Shadow Bar, The Old Dutch, the Big Mango, Electric Blue, The Duke of Wellington pub, and Bourbon Street Restaurant. The prizes will build up in case anyone doesn't win it immediately so the bonanza for the eventual winner could get quite interesting.  It will double to 7,000 and, if still no winner, to 10,500, etc.  Second prize is a "I Support Single Moms" T-shirt.  And please remember a part of all money received from the sale of my books goes to needy Thais (in the form of payment to go go dancers, waitresses and hostesses).

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A lovely lady at Nataree Massage Parlor who spent 13,000 baht total on her tattoos.  I do have to admit they were well done but with legs like those she needed no enhancement.  I am told by a reliable source that virgins go for about 20,000 baht but that "near virgins" go for 6,000 baht, whatever a "near virgin" may be.  Thirteen thousand baht and she said it hurt.  Sometimes I wonder about these chicks... But of course she might be into pain, speaking of which:

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You've Been a Very Bad Boy!

 

The lovely ladies of Chateau Jade, Bangkok. 
Great fun.  Waiting for you.  If you dare?

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Stay Away from King Power Duty Free at Thailand's Airport!

Demand your Embassy issue Travel Warnings about this!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/8154497.stm

The United States Embassy and others should issue an immediate travel warning to avoid the King Power duty free scam at Bangkok's international Airport.

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One of the Thai waitresses in a local restaurant asked me my age and then used the two-digit number in the lottery.  She won 2,000 baht.  Am I a hero, or what?  And once I found out I can get a discount for being an old guy whenever using the subway in Bangkok "lot dai din" I just go to the window, give my destination, and say my age.  So going to a massage parlor, for example, now costs about ten baht less.  One of the benefits of the Golden Years.  Unfortunately, the Sky Train doesn't have any such policy.

 

The other night I left my black shoulder bag somewhere.  I keep books and an umbrella in it, no money.  But, still, I definitely don't want to lose it.  So when I was about to leave the apartment and head out, I realized I didn't have it.  Then I had to try to remember where I had been the night before.  So I started off at Mojos.  No, they hadn't found any bag.  But I said if they did to have one of the dancers I know there call me.  So I went to Tilac.  The girl remembered me leaving with it on my shoulder.  (How's that for memory?)  So I ambled over to Rawhide and sure enough, they were keeping it for me.  Behind a glass shelf.  Which was locked.  And the cashier wasn't in yet with the key.  But then she arrived after a while, I got my bag, and headed off to a massage parlor to ease the strain of having lost my bag.  On the way, I got a cell phone call from the dancer at Mojos who wanted to know if I had found the bag.  I said, yes, no problem.  She said, great, where did you find it?  I said, um, where?  She said, yes, where?  I said, um, Starbucks.  She said, what?  I said, Starbucks.  Silence.  Then she said, OK, good, see you.

 

Well, OK, maybe it wasn't the best answer I could have come up with but at least I am still somewhat fast on my feet.

 

 

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Yep, nothin' like it!

 

 

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This temple is a five-minute walk from Siam Paragon shopping center and is called Wat Pra Thum WaRaRam.  A very large place, an interesting place and easy to get lost in - which I promptly did.

 

 

 

Stand-Up Comedy Night by Matt Super and his friends

 

Don't forget Bourbon Street Restaurant at Washington Square has a free stand-up comedy show August 1st with professional comedians.  8:30 p.m. Saturday.  Sounds like a hoot! 

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 FROM PAUL TO PAUL

 

(This may apply to you also, so read it!)

 

Dear Paul,
 
I am writing this letter you to because I am worried about you.
You seem to be trapped in a pattern of behaviour that causes you to repeat the same mistakes over and over again.

I think it's fair to say that I know you better than anyone else, and I really feel that if only you will listen to me, maybe I can help.
 
I understand that right now you don't want to listen.
I understand that you are in love, and that love is a powerful emotion.
But I also understand that sometimes it blocks out rational thought, and it can block out reality.
 
So... here goes!
 
The girl you've just met - I understand that she's adorable.
She's sweet.
She's young.
She seems to have a touch more vulnerability than the others.
You can talk to her. You feel maybe you can actually trust her - maybe she doesn't just like you for your money like all the rest.
And she has character - real character.  In that, she really isn't like the others.
The sex seems all the more powerful with her because it has emotion behind it.
But it is also because there is emotion that the sex isn't everything. Sometimes you just lie in bed talking. Sometimes you just want to hug her and hold her, and feel her warmth.
All the cliches you've ever heard about two souls meeting - you begin to wonder if they're true.
And you feel like you've known her all your life.
And you can't imagine not knowing her.
You don't want to leave. You don't want her to leave. You want to take care of her.
 
I understand why.
You know that she's staying in a shitty little room with only a fan and a thin bedmat, and you don't want her to have to live like that.
And even though she's clearly smart, the poor girl never had a chance to even finish high school. You could give her that opportunity.
Her parents know she works in a bar, and they take her money anyway.  How can they love her?  Has anyone ever really loved her? 
You could show her love - real love.
 
But most importantly, you can't bear to imagine her being fucked by a skinheaded, tattooed, football-vested moron called Neil from Northampton, or Gunther from Germany, or Mats from Sweden.
It makes you mad, doesn't it?
 
And she' s so adorable, so helpless.
It would be so easy wouldn't it?
Of course you would probably have to buy her out.
But it's only 10,000 Baht.
How much is 10,000 Baht in the whole grand scheme of things?
You used to spend that in a night back home.
To you it's nothing.
But to her, it could be everything.
It could save her from a lifetime of seedy short-time rooms.

 
NOW STOP RIGHT THERE!

 
Don't you remember!
You've been here before!
You've felt this before!
And did it work? Did it?
 
Don't think it won't be like last time. It will be exactly the same.
 
She won't like Western food, apart from the occasional Pizza Hut pizza and KFC.
So you're going to have to eat Thai food - every day.
And not just Thai food - Issan food.
So we're talking somtam, pla ra, and every other sort of stinky concoction. Your place will never smell the same again.
And she will eat and eat. Okay, Thai food is cheap, but she will just eat all day long.
And if there isn't any food in the house, you're going to have to interrupt everything you're doing and take her to buy more.
Because God forbid you don't feed her. She'll sulk and grumble and make your life hell.
 
Lost, Prison Break, House, Seinfeld - remember them?
Well you'd better remember them, because you won't be watching them any more.
Because she doesn't understand them, even with subtitles.
No, you'd better like Thai soap operas, because that's what you'll be watching.
That's not quite true. She does like some of the Truevision channels: the ones that play either Thai music or cartoons.
And if you don't like them or want to change channels, she will turn into a demon from hell.
 
But of course you can always escape the house and spend time with your friends, right?  
Wrong.
Because Thai girls get lonely.  And they are scared that there are ghosts in your place.  So they don't like to be left alone.
But if you take her with you, she can't speak to your friends, and she will get annoyed within about ten seconds that she's not getting all your attention, and will make such a noise that in the end you'll just take her home.
 
Gogo bars. Forget it!
 
Watching any form of sports. Forget it!
 
Going out for an Indian meal. Forget it!
 
But think of all the things you get in return!
 
Go on. Think of them!
 
Keep trying!
 
Oh no. That's right. There aren't any, are there.
 
You get blunt razors and strange bottles cluttering up the basin.
You get weird fruits left rotting around the place.
You get women's underwear in the sink.
You'll lie on something strange in bed and find it's a Boysian nasal spray.
You'll get constant reminders of how poor her family is, and how every time you spend any money, it's money you've basically deprived her village of.
Do I need to go on?
Do you really want me to remind you about women's menstruation - about the sheets, and the bathroom, about how once a month, your place will become a set from CSI.
 
And don't think you'll keep talking to her like you used to.
You've heard all her stories. She hasn't got any left.
And she isn't interested in your life. She barely knows what you do for a living.
 
But there's sex, isn't there?
Isn't there?
It's funny how that dwindles isn't it?
It's funny how boring her pussy will become to you.
You used to want to go down on her all the time, didn't you?
But more and more, you will just kind of skip that step.
You used to want it to last all night.  But soon, you'll just want to climax a.s.a.p and go to sleep.
It will almost become a chore.
 
And that's it really.
That is the end.
When the sex goes, you will start to wonder what the hell it's all for.
And then you'll begin to realise the terrible mistake you've made.
She thinks this is forever.
She thinks that you can put up with this for all eternity.
She thinks that you will never again fuck another girl.
She thinks that you're going to have kids together.
 
And you'll just want to get her the hell out of there.
You'll just want to be free.
And you know it's going to be hard.
You know there will be tears.
There may even be violence.
And your mind will already be working out the best way.
Can you fake a trip abroad?
Or a deadly disease?
 
And you'll wonder, how did I get myself into this again?
Why didn't anyone warn you?
Why didn't anyone stop you from making the same mistake again?
 
Well that's what I'm doing now.
Because I've just been through it.
And I was lucky.
I got out.
But please, please let it never happen again.
 
Paul

 

                                                                                                                  

                                    

 

Peter of the no-name group bars had a birthday the other day at the Queen's Victoria Pub.  Lots of fun.  I ran into Nick and Michael of the Big Mango who confirmed that their previous establishment is now a short-time hotel.  I already knew that from a dancer at Mandarin nearby but I hadn't realized that the girl gets a 100 baht kickback when she takes a guy there.  Nevertheless, according to her, it is the cleanest and best short-time hotel in Nana.  Progress is our most important Product...

 

There are those who say Thai women have not come very far in the feminist sense.  I beg to differ.  When I first arrived in Thailand in the 60's the massage parlor girls just sat there, no TV to watch.  I was in Poseidon the other night and they had not one but two TVs to watch, and it looked as if the screens were fairly large.  Again, Progress is our most important Project.  You've come a long way, baby.

 

Below are pictures from the birthday party of Nick Elphinstone at the private room of the Londoner Pub.  Pictures of girls and the cake.  But I forgot to take a picture of Nick.  Oh, well, next year, Nick, fo shore.  And, yes, that is the 70-year-old Al Eberhardt doing the limbo rock!

 

 

 

 

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Khun Nana's Corner

Khun Nana is a savvy local expat who keeps in shape by hitting most of the bars of Nana Plaza as often as possible.  From his vast experience, he will enlighten and entertain us with his recollections of the bar scene be they humorous, tragic or somewhere in between.

Thai women are so lovely, demure and sexy. They really are the epitome of what a woman should be in every way. Those of us who have relocated here to Paradise often discuss amongst ourselves the reasons we chose Thailand and remain here.  Yes, the weather is great, food delicious and cost of living is ridiculously low, but the wild card is the women.  I am an American, and for me it would be impossible to find a more definitive contrast in this life than the stark and startling difference between American women and Thai women.  They are so remarkably different that it almost doesn’t seem possible to me that they are the same gender of the same species of animal. 

The most compelling contrast is in the area of men and sex.  American women are barely interested in men, and it is a common discussion amongst American men how as a group we have been marginalized by the opposite sex in my native country.  It is a standing joke back home that the women are totally disinterested in sex, especially after they have already been in the relationship for a while.  How do you get an American woman to stop wanting sex?  Marry her.  What is even worse is that the women there use sex as a weapon to achieve their goals in the relationship and to manipulate the man into doing whatever they want him to do.  I have one married friend who “gets” sex exactly once a year, on his birthday.  Any other time that he touches his wife in bed, she barks “is it your birthday? I don’t think so. Take your fuck*ng hands off of me.”  Yet another of my pathetic friends back home claims to get sex from his wife once a month, with the stipulation that she can run up the credit cards while shopping that weekend. 

In stunning contrast, Thai women actually like men; I would even go as far as to say that they adore men.  If a Thai woman doesn’t have a man in her life she never feels complete.  They starve themselves, spend most of their time and money attempting to make themselves even more beautiful (which for many is nearly impossible as they are perfect already) to have the best chance of attracting a man.  One of my special ladies recently told me she had eaten only 1 meal a day for 10 days in order to lose 2 kilos.  I asked why she would do this as she has a perfectly flat and slim waist already.  Her answer was “this is Bangkok. So many perfect looking ladies and only a few available men.  I have to be perfect.”  Man oh man is it good to be a bloke in Bangkok. 

What is even more astonishing is that Thai women absolutely love sex!  I am man enough to admit that quite often I am just not up to the task of satisfying all the sexual needs and desires of my stable of women.  They want to be serviced often and will suffer in silence if you are not up to the job.  One of my favorite ladies had her wisdom teeth extracted a few weeks ago, so I picked her up at the dentist and escorted her home.  She was absolutely ashamed that she was obviously in too much pain to take care of my manly needs, and more than a bit disappointed that I didn’t want to climb on top and take care of the job myself! 

Another one of my absolute favorite gals is a flight attendant who stops by on her way to the airport for a little maintenance of her own.  Most of the time she only stays long enough for me to satisfy her, and then heads straight to the airport.  However the last time I saw her she had several hours of free time and came to me on a moments notice.  I looked in the toy section of my bedside table and was shocked to see that I was out of condoms.  She told me to go to 7-11 and very sternly snapped “and don’t just get a 3-pack.”  I am still sore from that night.  I am NEVER leaving this place. 

Speaking of western women, many guys in Thailand assume that the western women here are miserable, since the local men have no interest in them and 99% of the nighttime entertainment involves men pursuing their own erotic pleasures.  However, nothing could be further from the truth.  Western women have very little interest in men anyway, therefore being totally ignored here is probably welcomed by a large percentage of them.  Additionally, western women adore shopping, eating out and being pampered and this is the greatest place on earth for those 3 endeavors.  A gal can get a massage, manicure and steam bath daily, pleasures that cost an exorbitant amount in farangland but are dirt cheap here.  Gourmet restaurants are one third the price of back home, and the shopping is absolutely amazing.  Yes, guys, Thailand really is paradise for western women!

Until next time.  Khun Nana

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Letter to Bangkok Post (which they didn't print)

Dear Sir, In his column, Likhit Dhiravegin says "Mrs Clinton should understand full well that Asean - of which Burma is a member - wishes to handle any issue regarding its members as an ''internal affair'' for the regional grouping to decide on." 
 
In other words, the people of Burma will continue to suffer and Asean will continue to do nothing but no one should point out the utter and embarrassing failure of Asean to anything about the heinous Burmese regime.  Sorry, professor, but it seems Asean's type of quiet diplomacy, if doing nothing can be called that, is an enormous failure and I hope everyone continues to point that out. DB

http://www.ClubElectricBlue.com

"West Yorkshire police has been storing DNA samples from suspects and car crash victims in a freezer also used for ice cream, a watchdogs' report has said."  - Make mine Vanilla.

Dialogue in the Boots drugstore on Sukhumvit 23 at the register when the lights suddenly went out:

Girl: "Law, kha."

Me:  "Law?"

Girl:  "Law, kha."

Me: "Khun phoot phom 'law', khab?"

Girl:  "Law sa krue, Kha."

Of course law can mean handsome which I thought was the case.  But Raw or raw sa krue which she pronounced law means wait just a bit.  Oh, well...  By the way, the dictionary term for mixing up l and r is called lallation, although it doesn't sound very flattering the way they define it: "a speech defect in which l is pronounced instead of r, or in which an l-sound is mispronounced."  Lallation?  Why does that word make me think of breast-feeding?  Oh!  I know: Lactation.

The After Dark people want to know which cover is best.  The one with my name on it, of course.  It doesn't take rocket science, you know.

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Wat Mahabut in Phra Khanong district of Bangkok

 

 

This is an interesting temple for a number of reasons and can be reached by the klong behind it or by road.  It is on Sukhumvit soi 77, subsoi 7.  The temple is well known to Thais because of the famous ghost story of Mae Nak and is sometimes referred to by that name.  The tree, or rather upright log, known as Ton Takien is rubbed by Thais who hope to somehow receive the lucky lottery winning number.  The tree is incredibly smooth and has candle wax along it as well. 

Why should you care about all this?  Besides the fact that you are a good Buddhist, I mean?  Because worshippers go there to worship the spirit of the maiden in the ghost story known as Mae Nang Nak and believe me beautiful young women go there, as there was an unending stream of them the day I was there.  I assume this is typical.  To a Western mind, the ghost story makes little logical sense and I prefer my Noy of the Horny Toad ghost story, if I say so myself.  But Thai women love this place so do spend a bit of time there.  Of course, they have to take their shoes off at the shrine so if you are a foot fetishist that is a plus.  (I am not, but that is one of the few fetishes I don't have.)  And, of course, you can get your fortune told and worship at shrines to the Buddha as well as Kuan Yin, Goddess of Mercy.

Whatever the merits of the Nang Nak ghost story, there have been more than twenty films made!  But not one film has been made of Noy of the Horny Toad.  Sad, sad, sad.  Anyway, for Noy's ghost story click here.

 

 

Tony Cicoria, an orthopedic surgeon who began playing classical piano and composing after being struck by lightning, would be awfully impressive at your next party.  I wonder what would happen if I were struck by lightning.  Permanent erection maybe?

 

"BEAUTY IS ONLY A LIGHT SWITCH AWAY"

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Some Beauties I spotted in Shanghai, China.  Yum, yum, yum!

 

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Jesse Gump's Latest

"Blame It On Bangkok" by J.F. Gump – This just published book is a collection of short stories set in locations from Pattaya, Thailand to the Appalachian Region of North America. Based on true events, these stories capture the emotions of real people trying to make sense of the insanity whirling around them.  As one reader commented, "This book has a series of stories that grip and hold your heart.  It's the best collection of short stories I've ever read.  True, honest, warm and engaging..."  Jesse has promised to post a free story on his website. Look for it here: http://www.JFGumpNovels.com/.

 

Tiger, Tiger, Burning Bright, in the forest of the night

I love your curves, so clingingly tight

Those curves and I would fit just right

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Letters from Readers

 

 

Hello Dean,

I enjoy reading your witty website, but will otherwise spare you any gushing, fawning praise and get down to business. In your column of 15-31 May 2009 you posed the following question:

Why are the tequila lady drinks at Joy Bar / Apache 10 baht less than other lady drinks? Well, I surmise that other lady drinks do actually need to contain liquid that has to be purchased by the bar owner in the first place, whether it be beer, coca-cola or whiskey. Tequila is replaced by water so bar owners can afford to be a little more generous with a 10 baht discount. Long Gun, a bar for which I have an affectionate soft spot (as I believe you do too), was certainly guilty of this in 2007. A recent visit makes me think this is less prevalent now.

"If you will'. THANK YOU DEAN for highlighting the absurdity of this most pretentious, over-utilized and undeniably one of the most totally redundant phrases that has emanated from the news media in recent years. It means nothing. It is intensely annoying. Miles 'If you will' O'Brien (recently departed from CNN thank Buddha) was one of the most egregious offenders. Any news wanker/reporter who utters this gibberish should be sent to Guantanamo and be forced to watch 24 hour looped videos of Rosie O'Donnell rimming Khalid Sheikh Mohammed's hairy ass whilst being simultaneously waterboarded by a naked Nancy Pelosi.

With best regards from a discerning reader,

Atticus

 

 

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Hello Dean,

Your reader misinforms.


The Huey in the photo was taking DAO (Defense Attache Office) and other civilian US types off the roof of a BOQ - as pre-arranged - not a hotel.  The ladder they were climbing up was one of more than a dozen that were fabricated by DAO at the last minute to facilitate a hasty heli-evac from the several US civilian residences in Saigon - should the balloon go up (which it did).  The chopper was likely piloted by Air America personnel, or recently ex-military 'advisor' personnel  who were flying for the four party  ICCS (International Commission for Control and Supervision).
 

These rooftop people were not evac'd to the ships waiting out at sea, they were ferried to Tan Son Nhut to be manifested, then flown out to the ships in Marine Jolly Greens and other choppers.
 

The so-called "chickenshit" State Department did not order the military stop all flights.  Remember, there was no 'military' in country since 1972 - it was all State Department - The highest rung was the Embassy, and under them was the CIA Station operations (including Air America), and then there was the the DAO (Defense Attache Office) .  The fixed wing flights were, however, military C-130's and C-123's for the most part, and all from outside Viet Nam.   The flights (fixed wing only) were stopped at Tan Son Nhut Airbase by the military themselves when the NVA had hammered the airstrip with artillery and 122's to the point that it could not be used.  When the fixed wing flights could no longer operate, this was when the final heli-evac could no longer be postponed.
 

No Air America pilots were arrested for flying Hueys to the ships waiting offshore.  Absolutely none. In fact, no pilots, American or Vietnamese, were arrested.  Absolutely none.  The helicopters posed a real problem however.  Some were stored on board the ships after arrival (no reason for the pilots to fly them back - it was all over by then - they didn't know if they had a safe landing place if they did fly them back,), most of the Hueys didn't leave the mainland with adequate fuel to return, and even if they did, they wouldn't be able to refuel in Saigon or Vung Tau.  Several of the Hueys flown to the ships were ARVN or VNAF, not U.S.  The USS Vancouver, to which I was evac'd, was able to liberate two evac'd Hueys on the small rear heli-deck.  Those that were pushed over the side into the ocean (some were abandoned on floating barges) were in excess of that which could be 'rescued'.  And that's all there was to it.
 

I know how people love a good conspiracy, however, I  was a personal witness to this from the beginning (months previous)  to within a couple hours of that 'last chopper out'.  I coordinated parts of the evac under the then senior Marine adviser in Saigon, LTC Lukeman. Your reader has a vivid, vicious and conspiratorial imagination, (unless he was drunk when he wrote it) and I am saying this as politely as I can.....  Best, Mor

.......................

Many thanks, Mor, for the correction.  I'm sure the reader was just passing on what he knew.  As from time to time I read that the majority of people in Asian countries are now under 25 I'm not sure anyone realizes there ever was a war in Vietnam.

 

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Links You Might Enjoy

A video of a five-minute walk down Soi Cowboy.  Click here and then click "preview videos."

http://www.pbar.info/videos.html

 

Like to check out some bars in Thailand?  Try

http://www.bangkokbarfun.com.

Like to know what music is playing where in Bangkok each week?  Try http://www.bangkokgigguide.com.

Like to know more in depth about what music is playing where in Bangkok each week?  Try this great site:

http://www.bangkokjungle.com.

 

Tired of shoveling snow?  Check out Bangkok's sunshine.

 

Bangkok's weather report.

 

 

 

A great site for listening to Thai Morlan music and other folk music of Southeast Asia.

 

www.monsoon-country.org

 

 

 

A bit of black leather never hurts.  But she does.

 

Our Lady in Black

 

 

 

Like to learn a bit about retiring in Asia?

 

http://www.retiredexpat.com

 

 

 

Maps of all the provinces of Thailand

 

http://www.thailand-guide.org/maps/index.htm

 

 

 

Listen to RadioBangkok.net

 

mms://wma.radiobangkok.net/bangkok32?MSWMExt=.asf

 

 

 

Helping Kids in Thailand

 

Helping Thai Kids

 

 

 

A fine independent Pattaya Bookstore:

 

www.canterburytalescafe.com

 

 

Links You Might Not Enjoy

Politically incorrect rants and raves from Uncle Fred.

http://www.fredoneverything.net

 

Girlfriends looking for Taliban boyfriends.

Taliban Singles Dating Page

 

Very satirical writing and videos.

http://www.thenoseonyourface.com

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Do you have a product or service you would like to advertise on this website? You can, you know. In fact, you don’t have to have a product or service at all; you can just send me money. Or perhaps you would like me to plug a product or service that you are involved in? Sure, just send me cash. Be sure, however, to mark the outside envelope:

“Birthday money for Dean Barrett –

Absolutely No Bribe Enclosed

Got feedback to this column?  Got information on Thailand you would like to share?  Happy as a dung beetle to be living in Paradise?  Been ripped off?  Just write me.

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CONTEST

Enter and win a prize! This contest's first prize is worth 3,500 baht in food and drink vouchers.  The first to give the correct answer wins the vouchers; second wins the sexy shirt; third wins the sexy calendar.

     First prize:        Vouchers for food and drink from bars, pubs and restaurants in Bangkok

     Second prize:       Nifty shirt with the "I Support Single Moms" slogan

     Third prize:        Sexy calendar with Pattaya go go dancers, from After Dark magazine

     Fourth prize:       Nada Diddly-Squat Special 4 U, U number ten!

 

Winner of last month's best caption:

 

 

"You have to feel sorry for Ol' Grant.  Without his pitchfork he can't get Wood--he only strains his milk."

 

It's the Iowan classic "Grant Wood's American Gothic" morphed into the Issan classic "Scant Goods, American's Gotta Chick"
 

The original is American Gothic, painted by Grant Wood. 
Call this one "Amelican Gah-tik"

 

 

Question was:

 

Write the best caption

 

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This column's question:

 

Be the First: What is this place called?

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That's all for this fortnightly column.  Drop by again.  Explore the rest of the website.  Meanwhile, as the girls used to tell me during the 1960's: "I no lie you, GI, I love you long time; you number one!"  And, remember: nothing says goodbye like a bullet.  And the more people I meet the more bullets I need.

Dean Barrett can be flamed at: deanbarr@loxinfo.co.th

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"At least one thing seems certain: against people who are ready to die in the cause of destroying freedom, people who are not willing to speak up for freedom for fear of being called a racist or an Islamophobe don't stand much chance of victory."

 

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More News on the "Religion of Peace"

 

The "Religion of Peace" continues to visit Southern Thailand

 

(Even though Bangkok English-language Newspapers seldom report it)

 

A religious teacher and his friend are the latest fatalities in suspected insurgency violence in the South after they were shot dead in Narathiwat's Rangae district.  Police said the attack took place on Monday night as Abdulloza Baha, 25, an "ustad" or religious teacher, and his friend, Yago Samae, 19, were returning home from a religious class.

2009.07.07 Thailand Narathiwat   Two teenagers riding a motorbike are taken out by Religion of Peace gunmen.

2009.07.07 Thailand Pattani   A 40-year-old Buddhist man is shot to death by Muslim radicals while shopping at a grocery.

2009.06.30 Thailand Pattani   Muslim bombers kill a local soldier on patrol.

2009.07.19 (Pattani, Thailand) - A Buddhist man is shot to death by passing Muslims on a motorcycle.

 2009.07.19 (Narathiwat, Thailand) - A shopkeeper is murdered when Islamic radicals fire into his store.

2009.07.19 (Yala, Thailand) - Mujahideen shoot a plantation worker to death by the side of the road.

The True Islam:  Bangkok Post 29 July:  Insurgents killed two rubber tappers in the southern province of Pattani before detonating a bomb hidden under their bodies, injuring five more people, police said Tuesday.  The man and his wife, both Buddhists, were gunned down early in the day as they were going to work by motorbike.  Police were informed and while investigators were examining the scene the insurgents detonated a bomb hidden beneath the bodies of the couple.   Three members of the security forces and two civilians were injured by the blast.  In the neighbouring Narathiwat province, a roadside bomb exploded near Ban Dusongyor school as a motorised security patrol was passing. Six soldiers sustained minor injuries.
The school's director closed  all classes for the rest of the day.  The ambushes followed the murders of two people in the same province on Monday.  On Monday, a gunman shot dead a Muslim man at a marriage ceremony in the evening, police said.  Earlier that day, insurgents killed a painter in a drive-by-shooting when the man was riding a motorcycle to a teashop. 

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Over 3,600 Thais including monks and teachers and children have been murdered by Muslims in Southern Thailand and

over 45 Thais have been beheaded including Buddhist monks.

 

 

 

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Iranian Judge say Two will be Executed for Daring to Leave Islam

 

 

 

(Muslims like to say they are the fastest growing religion in the world; of course, they are: Besides the fact that they breed like rabbits, if they dare leave Islam they can and often are killed; often by family members.  Some "religion"!)

 

http://www.bosnewslife.com/8217-concerns-over-detained-iranian-christians-amid-political-turmoil

 

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Never Forget

The brutal and cowardly murder of journalist Daniel Pearl

(in the name of Allah, of course)

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Great Short Video by Pat Condell: Ban the Burka (& Where are the Western Feminists?)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TlkxlzTZc48

Stop Honorcide!

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Guests "check out" of Jakarta hotels, compliments of Muslim murderers.

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The True Islam

Never Forget the Slaughter of Iranians by the "holy" Thugs who Rule Them.

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Somali Islamist hardliners behead 7 people

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20090710/wl_nm/us_somalia_conflict_1

 

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France: Trial of Muslims who stabbed, tortured & set a Jewish man on Fire

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/8141593.stm

 

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England - Failed Muslim Asylum Seeker Beats & Kicks Sales Assistant to Death

http://theopinionator.typepad.com/my_weblog/2009/07/well-well-this-muslim-murderer-was-full-of-excuses-as-to-why-he-brutally-beat-and-killed-a-young-sales-assistant---david-coop.html

 

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Sweden: - Malmö: Woman dies after balcony fall, honor-murder suspected

http://islamineurope.blogspot.com/2009/07/malmo-woman-dies-after-balcony-fall.html

 

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The true History of Islam: Obama didn't quite get it Right in his Speech

http://www.worldviewtimes.com/article.php/articleid-5110/Brannon-Howse/William-J-Federer

 

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Mohammad Playing with his Six-year-old Bride to Be

The so-called Prophet Muhammad Married a six-year-old named Aisha and had Sex with the girl by the time she was nine (if not before).  Mohammad ordered the death of two poets who mocked him as well as killed many others.  The Koran is full of hate for non-believers which it equates with "evil-doers."  Islam is not a religion: it is a fanatical brotherhood and hate-filled ideology.  The West continues to ignore the fact that Islam is a clear and present danger to anyone who believes in free speech, an independent judiciary, free press, etc., etc.  Self-censorship is now being practiced in Europe and America to appease Muslims.  The more Muslims a country lets in, the more problems it will have.

Mullahs love little boys, oh yeah!

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"All it takes for evil to triumph is for enough good men to do nothing." - Edmund Burke

Ibn Warraq:

The cartoons in the Danish newspaper Jyllands-Posten raise the most important question of our times: freedom of expression. Are we in the west going to cave into pressure from societies with a medieval mindset, or are we going to defend our most precious freedom -- freedom of expression, a freedom for which thousands of people sacrificed their lives? A democracy cannot survive long without freedom of expression, the freedom to argue, to dissent, even to insult and offend...Unless, we show some solidarity, unashamed, noisy, public solidarity with the Danish cartoonists, then the forces that are trying to impose on the Free West a totalitarian ideology will have won; the Islamization of Europe will have begun in earnest.

19 Muslim hijackers killed more innocents in two hours on September 11th than the number of American criminals executed in the last 65 years. (source)
 

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  • "The sword of Muhammad and the Quran are the most fatal enemies of civilization, liberty, and the truth which the world has yet known." - The eminent orientalist Sir William Muir (1819-1905)

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    "All religions take care to silence or to execute those who question them...It has, however, been some time since Judaism and Christianity resorted openly to torture and censorship. Not only did Islam begin by condemning all doubters to eternal fire, but it still claims the right to do so in almost all of its dominions, and still preaches that these same dominions can and must be extended by war." - Christopher Hitchens, God is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything

     

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    'If the Arabs put down their weapons today, there would be no more violence. If the Jews put down their weapons today, there would be no more Israel.' - Benjamin Netanyahu

     

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    “Religion is an insult to human dignity.  With or without it, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things.  But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion.”        --        by Nobel Laureate physicist Steven Weinberg. 

     

     

    FROM THE KORAN:
    —The unbelievers are your inveterate enemy. (4:101)
    —Mohammed is God’s apostle. Those who follow him are ruthless to the unbelievers but merciful to one another. (48:29).
    —It is unlawful for a believer to kill another believer, accidents excepted. (4:92)
    —Believers, take neither the Jews nor the Christians for your friends. (5:51)
    —Make war on them until idolatry shall cease and God’s religion shall reign supreme. (8:40)
    —Fight against them until idolatry is no more and God’s religion reigns supreme. (2:193)
    —The true believers fight for the cause of God, but the infidels fight for the devil.  (4:76)
    —We will put terror into the hearts of the unbelievers. (3:151)
    —I shall cast terror into the hearts of the infidels. Strike off their heads, strike off the very tips of their fingers. (8:12)


    FROM THE SAYINGS OF MUHAMMAD:
    —Muhammad said to the Jews: “If you embrace Islam, you will be safe. You should know that the earth belongs to Allah and His Apostle, and I want to expel you from this land. “
    — Allah’s Apostle said, “You (i.e. Muslims) will fight with the Jews till some of them will hide behind stones. The stones will (betray them) saying, ‘O ‘Abdullah (i.e. slave of Allah)! There is a Jew hiding behind me; so kill him.‘ “
    —Mohammed said, “I have been ordered to fight with the people till they say, “None has the right to be worshipped but Allah, and whoever says, “ None has the right to be worshipped but Allah , his life and property will be saved by me.“ (otherwise it will not). Vol. 4:196
    —Mohammed said, “Whoever changes his Islamic religion, kill him.“ Vol. 9:57
    —Mohammed said, “ No Muslim should be killed for killing a Kafir” (infidel). Vol. 9:50
    —Muhammad said: “Fight in the name of Allah and in the way of Allah. Fight against those who disbelieve in Allah. Make a holy war, … “. (Sahih Muslim 4294)

     

     

     

    Some books that tell it like it is!

     

     

     

    The Islamization of Europe

    Muslims are rapidly destroying freedom in Europe and have even brought about self-censorship and real censorship in the United States.  But there is one city in Holland where a new reality can be seen with the naked eye, more than anywhere else. Here, entire neighborhoods look as if they have been lifted from the Middle East, here stand the largest mosques in Europe, here parts of sharia law are applied in the courts and theaters, here many of the women go around veiled, here the mayor is a Muslim, the son of an imam.  This city is Rotterdam, Holland's second largest city by population, and the largest port in Europe by cargo volume.  Europeans, especially politicians, will not lift a finger to fight against Islamofascism.  And future generations will pay the price. 

     

    “The religion of the future will be a cosmic religion.  It should transcend a personal god and avoid dogmas and theology.  Covering both the natural and the spiritual, it should be based on a religious sense arising from the experience of all things, natural and spiritual and a meaningful unity.  Buddhism answers this description.  If there is any religion that would cope with modern scientific needs, it would be Buddhism.” - Albert Einstein

     

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    Please note, I do not and never would advocate violence against individual Muslims in any community.  For one thing, the guy you beat up with a baseball bat may turn out to have just escaped from some horrible Islamic regime.  Individual violence against Muslims or doing damage to mosques, etc., is just stupid and is also counterproductive as Muslim fanatics will show pictures of that all over the Muslim world to incite people against the West. 

    A good case can be made that Islam is a fanatical brotherhood masquerading as a religion, and, indeed, the adherents of Islam often act that way.   But, as individuals, a Muslim neighbor might possibly be more honest than a Christian neighbor.  It is only that the Muslim will have been brought up in a religion/brotherhood with a medieval mindset that is centuries behind the times and has a penchant for violence, especially against those who criticize the Koran and other aspects of Islam.   Winning the war against Muslim fanatics will take a long time and be hard-fought but it can and must be won.  But we must demand that more and more moderate Muslims join the fight against fanatical Muslims.   We must demand that our leaders absolutely reject any "compromise" on our right to free expression.  Compromising with the fanatics pulls the rug out from the Muslim moderates desperately trying to reform and secularize Islam.  And we must never bow to Muslim demands to curb our hard-won freedom of expression.   And freedom of expression always includes satire and even insulting satire including satire of glorified tribal myths called religion. 

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    "Barrett has a gift for taking us into cultures worlds apart from our own, displaying a reverence for their exotic and grotesque as well as their beauty and history....”

    - The Poisoned Pen Book Review

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